Spiritual Healing

Saturday 28 January 2017

Sympathy feelings developed!

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Many erroneously believe that the terms sympathy and empathy are synonymous. Although both words have to do with feelings, they do express different grades of feelings. But before I go in to the details of explaining the differences, let’s look first at what the dictionary says.
Sympathy means feeling pity and sorrow for someone’s misfortune. Example: they had great pity for the flood victims. Sympathy can also be a formal expression of feelings, such as: Mark’s friends joined in sending their sympathies to his widow Jane.   
Another meaning for sympathy is the understanding between people, a common feeling, as in: the special sympathy between the two girls is obvious to everyone. Or, it can mean support in the form of shared feelings or opinions, as in: his sympathies lay with the other party. Sympathy can also mean to be in agreement with or to approve an opinion or aim, a favorableattitude, example: I have some sympathy for her point of view. Yet another meaning is relating harmoniously to something else, as in: repairs had to be in sympathy with the original structure. Sympathy can also be the state of fact of responding in a way similar or corresponding to an action elsewhere, as in: the magnetic field oscillates in sympathy.
Now let’s look at the word empathy. In this same dictionary where I found all the above, I found just one sentence to explain the word empathy, which was: the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. I was disappointed. I found this definition rather skinny so I searched further and here’s what I found: empathy is not to be confused with pity, sympathy or compassion. Then it said: empathy from the Greek to suffer is commonly defined as one’s ability to recognize, perceive and directly feel the emotion of another. As the states of mind, beliefs, and desires of others are intertwined with their emotions, one with empathy for another may often be able to more effectively define another’s mode of thought and mood. Empathy is often characterized as the ability to experience the outlook or emotions of another being within oneself, a sort of emotional resonance. This next definition I found to be quite accurate: Empathy involves the inner experience of sharing in and comprehending the momentary psychological state of another person.
So you see there is quite a difference in the two emotions of sympathy and empathy and I shall delve deeper into the meaning of both and why it is so much more desirable to develop the feeling of empathy in one and all regardless of age, gender or status in life.
process of the individual.

Why is it so important to develop this virtue, the quality of empathy? I believe in our day and age, when wars and violence are raging and rampant all around us, not only between nations but also in businesses, in institutions, in politics, in schools, in social groups and in
families, it is imperative and would be of a great advantage if we begin to look at this and to understand how empathy can change the life of a person and of everyone this person comes in contact with. I daresay that an empathetic person enjoys a much higher quality of life on every level, simply because with empathy an individual is more centered, calm, patient, fair, has an in-depth understanding of what another person is going through, is non judgmental, not afraid of responsibility or commitment, gives without expecting a return, is willing to share and has no desire to hurt anyone or to gain anything for selfish needs at

anyone else’s expense..
Sympathy focuses on feeling sorry for the person who is suffering because of bad news without really having any understanding or feeling with the peson in pain, whereas empathy focuses on experiencing and sharing the pain of the person with full understanding of the feelings, even tuning in to the inner world of the person in pain.
Here are some hints on how to develop the feelings of empathy. You can begin immediately and you will be surprised how soon you and the quality of your life will change for the better.
1:- Focus on the self and the feelings you have. Analyse and understand your own feelings and 
behavior patterns. Feelings of fear, resentments, joy, etc. You’ll probably find much that you will not be proud of. No matter, take note and keep on facing yourself with all the good and the bad. This should help you to cultivate tolerance and you will be less harsh and judgmental with others when you meet with their weaknesses.
2:- Next you focus on how similar your feelings are with other people’s feelings. Notice how much alike you are with all these feelings regardless of gender, race or background. We all have fears, harborresentments, are insecure in one area or another, are angry with someone, and we all have more or less the same wishes too, to do better and to move on in life. As you take notice and make the comparisons you will automatically have more understanding for everyone you deal with. With better understanding your relationships and communication will improve.
3:-Make a point to see other people’s perspective by reading about other people’s lives, or watching movies, documentaries or life stories. Live a day with an invalid to understand what it means to be blind or paralyzed. Put yourself in your child’s shoes for a day to see life from your child’s point of view. Imagine yourself in the other person’s place this will enhance your feeling of empathy. Show genuine curiosity and interest, be involved. This will widen your understanding of human behavior.
4:- Exposure to the suffering of others, their feelings, their pain helps in the development of the quality of empathy. Exposure to other cultures, beliefs, customs, promotes more understanding, flexibility and open mindedness which are the characteristics of empathy. Often people don’t watch the news, too much bad news they say. but if you cut yourself off from what is going on in the world you lose touch with reality. When you see the homeless on the streets, look at them, see them, imagine what it would be like if you were the one out there. How would you feel ?
5:-Encourage interpersonal relationships with schoolmates,
family,friends, neighbors and work colleagues. Look at the salesman in the eye, connect with the cab driver for a few minutes. Be polite and kind with family, neighbors and friends. Encourage team work and group activities wherever possible on every level. It is through being and interacting with other people that one learns to be tolerant of the diversity in character and background. One learns patience, one learns to share, to be less self centered and less selfish. The more open you are, the more receptive and the more exposure you have to different situations and structures the more empathy you will develop.

Friday 27 January 2017

The Power of Apology!



Apology changed my life. I believe it can change yours as well. Whether you have a difficult time apologizing to others when you have wronged them, difficulty receiving or accepting the apologies others have given you, or difficulty asking for the apologies that you feel are owed you, The Power of Apology will help you understand the obstacles that stand in your way and will offer you strategies to help work past them. It will also help you if you tend to overapologize or if you apologize automatically or too often, even if you haven't done anything wrong. Whether by force of habit, as a way to avoid conflicts, or as a symptom of low self-esteem, overapologizing can be just as troublesome as not apologizing often enough. It can affect how others perceive you, your image of yourself, and your status in a relationship or in your career. 
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The Power of Apology:- 
 is about bringing families and friends back together when they have been estranged, as well as bringing couples and families closer together on a daily basis. It is about teaching our children to take responsibility for their actions and to have empathy and compassion for others. Ultimately, it is about saving your soul and the souls of those you love. 
Apology has the power to heal individuals, couples, and families. Almost like magic, apology can mendour relationships, soothe our wounds and hurt pride, and heal our broken heart.
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When we apologize to someone we have hurt, disappointed, neglected, or betrayed, we give them a wonderful gift that is far more healing than almost anything else we can give. By apologizing we let the other person know that we regret having hurt him or her. Just as important, we let this person know we respect him and we care about his feelings. It becomes one of the most effective tools for mending a relationship.
    Apology is not just something we do to be polite. It is an important socialritual, a way of showing respect and empathy for the wronged person. It is also a way of acknowledging an act that can't go unnoticed without compromising the relationship. Apology has the ability to disarm the anger of others, to prevent further misunderstandings, and to bridge the distances between people.
    But apology has more than the power to soothe wounds or mend relationships. In some instances, it even has the ability to rehabilitate an individual, resolve conflicts, and restore social harmony. While an apology cannot truly undo harmful effects of past actions, paradoxically, if done sincerely and effectively, this is in fact what apology manages to do. When an apology is received as the gift that it is and reciprocated by the gift of forgiveness, it is nothing short of a miracle.
    Apology is also an important factor in creating and maintaining healthy relationships. When we apologize to those we've hurt, slighted, disappointed, betrayed, or angered, the caring and respect we convey through our apology fosters love and trust.
    When someone does something that hurts our feelings but does not apologize for it, we become resentful of that person. This resentment can take the form of our distancing ourselves from her, expressing our anger in numerous direct or indirect ways, or feeling less motivated to be considerate or caring toward her.
    When your own behavior is offensive, inconsiderate, or hurtful, the recipient of your behavior grows wary of you. Whether he realizes it consciously, he feels he must be on guard. He no longer feels as relaxed around you and may even feel that he can no longer trust you. If an apology is not forthcoming, this wariness and distrust will grow. It's one thing to hurt another person, but it's another thing entirely to either not be aware that you have hurt him or to not care. If this occurs at the beginning of a relationship, it may influence whether the relationship continues. If the relationship is already an established one, it may add to a growing sense of alienation and resentment.

Apologizing to another person is one of the healthiest, most positive actions we can ever takefor ourselves, the other person, and the relationship. Apology is crucial to
our mental and physical health and well-being. Research shows that receiving an apology has an obvious and positive effect on the body.
 The act of apology is not only beneficial to the person receiving it but to the one giving it as well. The debilitating effects of the remorse and shame we can feel when we've hurt another person can eat away at us until we become emotionally and physically ill. By apologizing and taking responsibility for our actions, we help rid ourselves of esteem-robbing shame and guilt.

mind healing