Spending Time Alone Healing!

In today's constantly connected world, finding solitude has become a lost art. In fact, Western culture tends to equate a desire for solitude with people who are lonely, sad, or have antisocial tendencies. But seeking solitude can actually be quite healthy. In fact, there are many physical and psychological benefits to spending timealone. 
Benefits of Seeking Solitude:-

1. Solitude allows you to reboot your brain and unwind:-  
Constantly being "on" doesn't give your brain a chance to rest and replenish itself. Being by yourself with no distractions gives you the chance to clear your mind, focus, and think more clearly. It's an opportunity to revitalize your mind and body at the same time.

2. Solitude helps to improve concentration and increase productivity:-
When you remove as many distractions and interruptions as you can from your day, you are better able to concentrate, which will help you get more work done in a shorter amount of time.

3. Solitude gives you an opportunity to discover yourself and find your own voice:-
When you're a part of a group, you're more likely to go along with what the group is doing or thinking, which isn't always the actions you would take or the decisions you would make if you were on your own.

4. Solitude provides time for you to think deeply:-
Day to day responsibilities and commitments can make your to-do list seem as if it has no end. This constant motion prevents you from engaging in deep thought, which inhibits creativity and lessens productivity.

5. Solitude helps you work through problems more effectively:-
 It's hard to think of effective solutions to problems when you're distracted by incoming information, regardless of whether that information is electronic or human. 

6. Solitude can enhance the quality of your relationships with others:-  
By spending time with yourself and gaining a better understanding of who you are and what you desire in life, you're more likely to make better choices about who you want to be around. You also may come to appreciate your relationships more after you've spent some time alone.

Despite knowing these benefits, it can be a challenge to find time alone in a world that seems to never sleep. Here are a few ideas to help you find more time to spend with yourself.

1:-Disconnect:-
Set aside some time each day to unplug from all the ways you connect with others. Turn off your cell phone, Turn off your Internet. Turn off your TV. If you use your computer to create, such as writing, then write without all the bells, dings, and beeps that come along with being connected to the Internet. You'll be amazed at how much more you can get done when you're not distracted.

2:-Get Up or Get In Early:- 
 Wake up a half hour or an hour earlier than everyone else in your house and use that time to create, produce, problem solve, meditate, or whatever makes you happy. This strategy also works if you can get to work before everyone else arrives and the phones begin to ring.

3:-Close Your Door:- 
 It's simple, but can be very effective. A client who owns a community-based magazine puts a sign on her door when she doesn't wants alone time. The sign reads "I'm editing or writing. If the police are here, the office is on fire, or stops by, you can interrupt me. If not, please hold all questions until my door opens." She said that she decided to put up the sign after she realized that her presence in the office was a stimulus for questions. "Whenever I was in the office," she said, "it seemed like there was one question after the next. I was constantly getting interrupted, and it was hard to get my work done. Then I noticed that on the days I was working on a story outside the office, my phone hardly ever rang, even if I was out the whole day. Apparently, whatever questions came up somehow got handled without me. It made me realize that just by being in the office I was a magnet for questions. So I put up the sign and it works like a charm."

4:-Use Your Lunch Time:- 
 Don't spend your lunch time working at your desk. Don't spend it running errands. And if you regularly go out to lunch, don't think that it always has to be with others. Once a week or even just a couple of times a month, commit to spending lunch with yourself. Walk. Sit in the sun outside. Go to a park and eat. Enjoy the time you have alone.

Schedule solitude:- 
 Literally. Mark off time in your day planner or calendar for spending time with yourself. If you can make time for all the little extras you fit into your day, like stopping at Starbucks or picking up something at the mall, you can schedule time in your calendar for solitude. It doesn't have to be long. Any time that you can spend alone with yourself to reboot, meditate, focus, relax, create, produce, and/or think deeply is better than no time.

In my next post, Why You Shouldn't Feel Guilty about Stealing a Little Time for Yourself, I talk about ways to negotiate alone time with friends and family and how to avoid feeling guilty about it. And if you have effective strategies you use to steal a little time for yourself,

Reduce Holidays Stress Simple Tips!

1. Change Your Mindset:- 
Of course, the holidays are a special time of year meant to celebrate friends and family, but we're not talking about a once-in-a-lifetime occurrence here. Christmas may come but once a year, but it comes every single year without fail. If you're too busy to participate in every party or family tradition this year, don't worry. There's always next year! This same kind of thinking can also help you make healthierdecisions when it comes to holiday eating. Yes, your aunt's gingerbread cookies are delicious, but you can enjoy a couple every year instead of feeling like you have to eat the whole tin all at once. Sweet talk her into giving you the recipe, and, even if you never get around the baking them, you'll know that you can have your favorite treat anytime you want.

2. Practice the Power of No:-
The word no is extremely powerful and liberating. It's tempting to say yes to every invitation and every opportunity to volunteer during the holidays. But you'll enjoy the parties and other events more if you pick and choose the ones that are closest to your heart. There's no need to lie or to explain why you can't participate. Simply say, "I'm sorry. I already have plans for that time." Whether your plan is to make time for exercise or simply to get some needed rest, don't feel obligated to take on more than you can. This can be quite challenging, though. Force yourself to practice saying no in small ways. For example, try politely refusing a cookie from a well-meaning coworker.

3. Simplify Your Celebration:-
Holiday traditions are wonderful and help create lasting family memories, but there's no reason why you can't choose to create new traditions that better fit your current lifestyle. Do you really need to cook a meal for your entire extended family? Instead, could you roast the turkey or make another main course and ask everyone else to bring a side dish or dessert? Do you really need to buymultiple gifts for everyone? Instead, could the adults in the family draw names to create a smaller gift exchange and save other gift giving for children? 

4. Focus on Others:- 

Instead of getting wrapped up in gift giving, baking and other holiday obligations, find a way to give back to your community this year. You might choose to volunteer at a toy drive for underprivileged children or help out at a local food bank. Instead of fightingcrowds at the mall, you could be doing good for others and for yourself. There are many benefits to giving back for your own health and well-being.

5. Choose a Charity Gift.:-
Another great way to avoid the mall or hours of online shopping is to give charity gift cards to friends and family. You can buy cards and certificates from sites like Tis Best, Just Give and Network for Good that allow the recipient to donate the money to the non-profit of their choice. That way you and your family can feel good about supporting causes that are important toeach one of you.

6. Don't Skip Your Regular Workouts:-
It's easy to find extra time in your schedule by cutting back on gym visits or afternoon walks, but because exercise is such an effective form of stress relief, all you'll be buying yourself is exhaustion and added worry. By the same token, don't try to beat holiday eating by ramping up your workouts to unrealistic levels. Instead, enjoy holiday treats in moderation and focus on sustainable fitness goals. If you want to add some extra calorie burn to your regular cardio (in a short amount of time), try some high-intensityinterval training.

7. Boost Your Immune System:-
There's nothing more stressful during the holidays than coming down with a cold or the flu. To protect yourself during the winter months, make sure you're getting ample fruit and vegetables in your diet, staying hydrated, getting enough sleep and washing your hands regularly. And get a flu shot to protect yourself from the most common strains of the flu virus.

8. Be Flexible:-
Instead of trying to pack multiple family celebrations into a single day or weekend, create your own schedule for festive gatherings when it's more convenient for everyone. For example, if you celebrate Thanksgiving with one side of your family, invite the other side over a few days later to celebrate leftovers day. Everyone can bring leftovers or a new dish to share. You can eat up all the extra food while it's still good and spend time with the people you love in a less formal setting than a sit-down dinner.

9. Take a Day Off:-
Rather than trying to fit all your holiday errands in on the weekend, use one of the vacation days you were saving for the holidays for some stress-free mid-week shopping. The mall will be less crowded and you'll be able to zip through all the tasks on your list. And you'll also get more done on that day you're alone in the office without any interruptions from coworkers. Not being greeted by an overflowing email inbox on January 2 will be a huge stress reliever, too.

10. Get Out of Town:-
 Need a fool-proof excuse for skipping out on holiday obligations? Book a vacation. It can be just you and your significant other, or you can bring your immediate family along. Use the money you would have spent on gifts to fund your trip and accumulate memories instead of stuff. Who knows, maybe winter travel is a new family tradition that you can pass on to the next generation--the gift of a totally stress-freeholiday season!

11. Take a Deep Breath:- 
 If you find yourself feeling too stressed out and overwhelmed to even consider any of the suggestions above, pause for five minutes and take a few cleansing breaths. Then get a piece of paper and write down all the tasks that are swirling around in your head and driving your crazy. Consult a calendar and allot specific time periods to spend on each item on your list. Once you have a plan in place, you can focus on checking off tasks instead of worrying about how to juggle everything. (Discover 10 simple ways to de-stress in five minutes or less.)

Healthy Life Style!

Here are healthy lifestyle tips you can incorporate into your daily life to promote your health and well-being. Some are tips that you should implement on a daily basis and others are minor changes you can make to your life to foster healthy living.

1:-Daily exercise is one of the most important healthy lifestyle tips. Exercise on a daily basis for at least 30 minutes per day. Brisk walk, aerobics, or just any kind of bodily movement can do wonders for your health.

2:-You should sleep 6 to 8 hours per day. This will help your body to replenish itself and gives your body time to rebuild its cells. Lack of sleep make you feel tired and affect your eating habits. Adequate sleep is essential for your overall health and well-being.

3:-Eat a well-balanced diet. Increase your intake of fruits and vegetables. Avoid foods that are processed and reduce your intake of foods that are high in fat, sodium and sugar.

4:-Maintaining a healthy weight will help you look better and reduce your risk of heart disease and diabetes.

5:-Have a positive outlook. People who are positive tend to have better health and success in life then those who are negative thinkers.

6:-Maintain a balanced lifestyle. There should be a balance between your work time and your leisure time. Remind yourself, “All work and no play make Jack a dull boy.”

7:-Stop smoking. It is harmful to your health. It can cause heart disease, lungs cancer, and premature aging.

8:-Meditation can help reduce stress, because it helps quiet your mind. Even if you just meditate 15 minutes per day, the result will amaze you.

9:-Reduce your intake of alcohol.

10:-Surround yourself with friends and family members who are supportive. 

11:-Manage stress by doing meditation, breathing exercises, listening to music, etc. Stress, left not managed, can lead to tension and pain in your body and threaten your health and well-being.

12:-Drink 8 to 10 glasses of water daily to help you with the digestion of food, absorption of nutrients, and the elimination of toxins from your body.

13:-Take daily vitamins, mineral and herbal supplements to maintain your overall health or deal with your specific health problems.

14:-Find things to laugh about on a daily basis. Laughter releases endorphins, boost your immune system, increases blood flow and relaxes your body.

15:-Spending 5 to 10 minutes per day to practice deep breathing can improve your overall health. Deep breathing reduces stress, relaxes your muscles, improve your oxygen intake and delivery to all your organs and stimulate your lymphatic system.

16:-Avoid your exposure to toxins like pesticides, molds, fungus and heavy metals like lead, mercury, aluminum, etc.

17:-Eat complex carbohydrates and avoid simple carbohydrates like white bread, sugar, white rice, etc.

18:-Eat organically grown fruits and vegetables, if possible, to avoid getting exposed to pesticides.

19:-Life is too short so you should follow your bliss. People who are happy and have a fulfilled life tend to be healthier and live longer.

20:-Avoid people who talk about illnesses.

21:-Get outside and spend your time in the open air daily, if possible. Exposing yourself to fresh air and sunshine on a daily basis is beneficial to your health.

22:-Be appreciative of your life, your health and whatever you have. Gratitude is good for your soul as well as your health.

23:-Choose happiness and health. Make it your dominant intention to focus on things that make your life healthy and happy.

24:-See yourself healthy and happy in your mind’s eyes.

25:-Forgive yourself and others. Bearing grudges is bad for your health and well-being.

26:-Remind yourself that it is natural for you to be healthy. Health is your natural state, not sickness.

27:-Have a raw food diet day, a day where eat only unprocessed and uncooked foods, once or twice a month. This way you give your body a break from all the food additives and preservatives. Make sure that you consume only organic foods.

28:-Try alternative medicine like acupuncture, aromatherapy, reflexology, etc.

29:-Practice yoga. It’s good for both your body and mind.

30:-Fasting once in a while is a good way to detox your body and gives your digestive system some time off.

31:-Do not worry. Worry will not help you solve your problem and it is not good for your health. Worry is the main causes of many physical ailments that send people to hospitals. Remember that most of the things that you worry about will probably never happen anyway.

32:-Expect to be healthy and do not expect to be sick.

33:-Accept yourself, your capability and your shortcomings.

Benefits of Smiling and Laughing!

1. Neurotransmitters called endorphins are released when you smile.

These are triggered by the movements of the muscles in your face, which is interpreted by your brain, which in turn releases these chemicals. Endorphins are responsible for making us feel happy, and they also help lower stress levels. Faking a smile or laugh works as well as the real thing—the brain doesn’t differentiate between real or fake as it interprets the positioning of the facial muscles in the same way. This is known as the facial feedback hypothesis. The more we stimulate our brain to release this chemical the more often we feel happier and relaxed.

2. Endorphins make us feel happier and less stressed.

They also act as the body’s natural pain killers. For sufferers of chronic pain, laughing and smiling can be very effective in pain management, as can laughing off the pain when you bump an elbow or fall over.

3. While the release of endorphins is increased, the stress hormone cortisol is reduced.

Cortisol is more active when we feel stressed or anxious and contributes to the unpleasant feelings we experience, and by lowering it we can reduce these negative feelings.

4. Laughing expands the lungs, stretches the muscles in the body and stimulates homeostasis.

This exercises the body, replenishing the cells from a lungful of oxygen and gaining all the benefits of exercising the body.

5. A good laugh can be an effective way to release emotions.

A good laugh can help you release emotions, especially those emotions that you might bottle up inside. Everything looks that little bit better after a good laugh and life can be seen from a more positive perspective. Smiling and laughing have positive socialimplications as well.

6. Smiling is an attractive expression, which is more likely to draw people to you rather than push them away.

Smiling makes you appear more approachable. Interaction with others is easier and more enjoyable when smiles and laughs are shared, and these behaviours are contagious, making others feel better too, and make you a more appealing and attractive person to be around. This in turn will have a positive effect on your well-being.

7. A happy, positive expression will serve you well in life.

This is particularly  true for challenging situations such as job interviews: a smiling, relaxed persona indicates confidence and an ability to cope well in stressful situations. This will also be of benefit in your career, building healthy relationships with colleagues and being seen in a favourable light by your employers.

How to Smile and Laugh More Often tricks:-

There are simple ways to bring more smiling and laughing into your day:

1:-Smile and laugh regularly. As mentioned, your brain does not know the difference between a fake or real smile, and by doing so more often you will feel better, and become more likely to smile and laugh more spontaneously.

2:-Watch funny films, TV, and theater shows. This is a excellent way to inject some instant humor into your life. By avoiding negative programs and news broadcasts, you can also balance make your viewing more positive and lighthearted, with more opportunity for a chuckle or two.

3:-Spend time with friends and family that make you feel happy. Surrounding yourself with happy, fun-loving, optimistic people will bring out your happy side, and their behaviour will rub off on you as you subconsciously mimic their behavioural patterns.

4:-Find things to smile and laugh about. Once you start consciously looking at all the things that are funny and uplifting, you will be more aware of them, in tune with them, and more ready to engage in a spontaneous smile or laugh.

Happy Marrige trick!

 Psychotherapist who specializes in couples therapy, believes that relationships don’t require hard work. They do require “attention and intention.”

1:- Greet your partner lovingly in the morning:-

When you first see your spouse, instead of having a negative or even neutral interaction, greet them with a positive statement, Bush said. It could be anything from “I’m glad to wake up beside you” to “I’m so happy to be married to you,” she said. The key is to be positive and loving.

2:-Send a sweet text:-

Use modern-day technology to stay connected throughout the day by sending your spouse a playful, flirtatious or sweet text, Bush said. Write anything from “I miss you” to “I can’t wait to see you tonight,” she said.

3:-Reunite with a hug:-

Often people will reunite and it’s unconsciously thoughtless, Bush said. For instance, partners might focus more on checking the mail or criticizing, such as “Why didn’t you cook dinner?” or “Why didn’t you take out the trash?”

Instead, any time you reunite with your partner, “have an intentional hug that lasts 20 seconds.” This is actually longer than the average hug, and it’s “long enough for oxytocin, the bonding hormone, to be released.”

4:- Touch your partner at mealtime:-

When you’re eating dinner together, make it a point to touch your partner. You might touch their hand or arm, or your legs might touch, she said.

5:-Compliment your partner at the end of the day:-

Many marriages, Bush said, suffer from chronic under-appreciation. Partners don’t feel appreciated, and they, too, don’t show their appreciation, she said. The relationship becomes clouded by a “sense of lack and taking each other for granted.”

She suggested couples end the day by thanking each other for one small act they did that day. It could be anything from “Thanks for picking up the dry cleaning” to “Thanks for making dinner” to “Thanks for hanging out with my family.”

Not only does your partner feel appreciated after your compliment, but “you start to train yourself to look for the good. You focus your attention on the things they do, not just what they don’t do.”

6:-Express your needs from a place of vulnerability:-

Often people will criticize as a way of describing their needs, Bush said. So instead of a request, it comes You’re always on the computer.

Instead, try: “I’d like to spend some time with you. Could you spend some time with me?” This invites a dialogue between partners, she said.

7:- Feel each other’s breath:-

This might sound like a strange practice, but it’s a powerful way to enhance your intimacy. Put your hands on each other’s chest or belly and feel your partner’s breathing, Bush said. Synch your breath together for one minute. Some couples also look into each other’s eyes.
Some days you probably won’t feel like showing appreciation or being affectionate. You might be in a miserable mood or downright exhausted. But try it anyway.

If you do a loving behavior, you start to feel more loving,” Bush said. She likened it to feeling depressed. You don’t want to do the things that will make you feel better. And, yet, when you do the things that make you feel better, you feel better.

Also, keep in mind that time with your spouse is finite. People don’t realize that their relationship can end because of a divorce or death, Bush said. She works with many grieving spouses, who would “give anything for one more hug and kiss.

Simple Muscle Tension Release your Mind And Body!

Stress simply distracts the body from healing itself.  Don’t let stress be the number one focus for your mind and body.
1: Part your lips slightly:-
The simple act of parting your lips ever so slightly can create an amazing release for your jaw, neck and throat area.  When you part your lips its very difficult to grind teeth, clench your jaw or purse your lips.  In fact, if you are anything  like me you won’t realize how much stress you hold in your jaw area until you part your lips slightly and feel the difference.

2:  Relax your shoulders:-
Tight tense shoulders generally bunch up around your ears, restrict the flow of blood to your brain, round your shoulders and even sink your chest.Un-hunch your shoulders, spread your collar bones, lift your chest and relax your neck and jaw.  Now, feel the difference.

3:  Draw a figure eight into your palm:-
Distract yourself from stressing and shift your thinking by tracing a figure -eight onto the palm of your hand.  It’s bliss.Another lovely place to draw the figure is around your eyes.Very soothing and relaxing for your whole face.

4:  Grab your ears:- 
Pinch your ear lobes between your thumb and index finger. Holding a firmish grip allow the weight of your arms to pull your ears down.  If you are holding lots of tension in this area you will notice instant relief as pressure is released from your head, your neck lengthens,  your shoulders relax and you feel lots more space in this area of your body.

5:  Face yoga – stick out your tongue:- 
 Lions pose is great for releasing tension and frustration held in your face and upper body area.  You literally stick out your tongue as far as it will go and then roar like a lion.  Releases oodles of frustration, tension and stress.  If roaring like a lion is not your thing then pretend you are Gene Simmons from Kiss.

6:  Remember to breathe:- 
When stressed we often hold our breath which traps tension in our muscles and body.  Remember to breath. When the breath is unsteady, everything is unsteady.If I had to limit my advice on healthier living to just one tip, it would be simply to learn how to breathe correctly.

7:  Chew your food longer:-
Yes, its true.  Chewing your food is a natural relaxant.A natural de-stressor is to chew your vegetables.  It releases four times more serotonin.Serotonin is often known as the molecule of happiness.

8:  Spend longer on your exhale:- 
Your inhale stimulates and your exhale relaxes.   Use your next exhale to release tension and put a healthy distance between you and whatever is stressing you out.

9:  Rest on your  yoga bolster:-
 If you have the luxury of resting on your yoga bolster for a few moments – then do it.   Laying down and lowering your head triggers relaxation in your body.  If you don’t have a yoga bolster then 2 or 3 blankets rolled together are perfect for you to rest in a restorative yoga pose such as, supported childs pose.

10:  Chant Om:- 
Chanting “Om” creates vibrations inside your mouth that are similar to striking a gong.  It’s great for releasing tension in the face, neck and upper body. Chanting om (aum)  is refreshing and brings a light quality to your being.  I find it a wonderful relaxer.

11:  3 rounds of alternate nostril breathing:- 
This has to be one of my favourites and I have to say works every time for me.   Alternate nostril breathing relaxes your whole body.  It soothes your nervous system, calms an agitated mind, your emotions and relaxes stressed breathing.

12: Belly breathing for instant relief:-
Do you hold stress in your stomach area like me ?  Then use your breath to dissolve any tightness and tension.Place your hands on your belly and feel the rise and fall of your tummy with each inhale and exhale.  Continue until you feel it soften, open up and relax.  Ah! now doesn’t that feel better.  It’s impossible for a soft relaxed tummy to hold tension.

Ways to overcome Negative Thinking!

We have also come up with 4 tips to help you overcome negative thinking and increase your positive outlook on the work that you do.

1:- Become Conscious of the Things that go Through Your Mind:-

Don’t become alarmed over the number of negative thoughts that are running through your head. If it happens and you notice it, then let it go and avoid talking about it aloud to colleagues, friends and managers. As well, think of the ways in which you can change your negative thoughts into something positive.
For example, you can change “I am not getting any sales today” thought into “The sales environment is challenging but I am up for it.” Give it a try!
2:- Change the Way you Feel:-

This is the most difficult part of the process. To unfreeze the feelings you want replaced and refreeze the new ones, begin by visualizing the outcome(s) you desire. The outcome must be real and measurable and something that you can achieve in a decent period of time.
3:- Take Affirmative Action:-

If no action is taken, change will never take place. Actively go about your day and apply what you have learned every time there is an opportunity. It will be difficult to do so at beginning, but if you have the perseverance and the strength, you will be able to over come your negative thinking.
4:-Surround Yourself with Positive People:-

Call upon a friend or colleague who you know could give you constructive, yet positive feedback. When you’re stuck in a negative spiral, talk to people who can put things into perspective and won’t feed your negative thoughts. Two negatives, don’t always make a positive

Loneliness deal Important tips!

Have you ever been lonely in a crowd? Have you ever been perfectly content all alone? Me too. And I have also suffered from loneliness:-

Loneliness is a complex mental and emotional phenomenon that has at its base a powerful emotion that has survival value for children. All of us have experienced some degree of abandonment, if only for a short time, and remember the painful and scary feeling that goes along with it.

Whenever we are reminded of this feeling or anticipate it in the future, we get a twinge of abandonment distress that we experience as loneliness. This can happen among a crowd of friends or even after making love. It can be pretty confusing and can put you off your game if you don’t know what’s going on.

Here are some tipsfor recognizing loneliness for what it is and dealing with it in the healthiest ways.

1. Realize that loneliness is a feeling, not a fact:- 
 When you are feeling lonely, it is because something has triggered a memory of that feeling, not because you are in fact, isolated and alone. The brain is designed to pay attention to pain and danger, and that includes painful scary feelings; therefore loneliness gets our attention.

But then the brain tries to make sense of the feeling. Why am I feeling this way? Is it because nobody loves me? Because I am a loser? Because they are all mean? Theories about why you are feeling lonely can become confused with facts. Then it becomes a bigger problem so just realize that you are having this feeling and accept it without over reacting.

2. Reach out because loneliness is painful and can confuse you into thinking that you are a loser, an outcast:-
You might react by withdrawing into yourself, your thoughts, and your lonely feelings and this is not helpful. At its best, anticipation of loneliness might motivate us to reach out and cultivate friendships, which is the healthiest thing to do if you are sad and alone. When you are a child, and your sadness causes you to cry, you may evoke a comforting response from others.

3. Notice your self deflating thoughts:- 
We often create self centered stories to explain our feelings when we are young, it is not unusual for children to assume that there is something wrong with them if they are not happy. If they are lonely and sad, children may assume other people don’t like them when this is rarely the case.

Victims of bullying may well have fans and friends, but they often aren’t aware of it because the shame and loneliness get more attention. Habitual assumptions about social status continue into adulthood and if you are looking for evidence that the world sucks, you can always find it.

4. Make a plan to fight the mental and emotional habits of loneliness:- 
If you realize you are dealing with an emotional habit, you can make a plan to deal with loneliness. Since healthy interaction with friends is good, make some effort to reach out to others, to initiate conversation and face time even when your loneliness and depression are telling you not to. Yes, it is work, but it is worthwhile, just like exercising is worthwhile even when you are feeling tired or lazy.

5. Focus on the needs and feelings of others, the less attention on your lonely thoughts and feelings:-
I can walk down the street thinking about myself, my loneliness and the hopelessness of it all, staring at the sidewalk and sighing to myself. Or I can walk down the street grateful for the diversity of people I get to share the sidewalk with, silently wishing them good health and good fortune, and smiling at each person I meet. The latter is more fun, even though I sometimes have to remind myself to do it on purpose.

6. Find others like you:- 
Now days there are more tools than ever before to find out where the knitters, hikers or kite boarders are congregating so that you can get together with those who share your interests. This makes it much easier to identify groups with which you will have something in common, a natural basis for beginning a friendship.

7. Always show up when meeting up with others:- 
 You don’t have to run for president of the knitters society at your first meeting. But you do have to show up. I have been telling others to practiceyoga for 20 years and promising I would do it myself for just as long, but except for the occasional coincidental yoga offering at a retreat, I didn’t take the trouble of finding a class I could attend regularly until a month ago. Now I am enjoying it and it wasn’t that hard. I have put a reminder in my phone to resign from the procrastinator’s society.

8. Be curious, but don’t expect perfection or applause:- 
Each time you show up is an experiment, a micro adventure in social bonding. If you are curious about and interested in others, they will be attracted to you because you are giving them attention. So you will get attention in return. Curiosity about others also takes your focus away from those painful feelings that tend to make you hide and sulk.

9. Kindness goes a long way:-
You have the power to offer loving kindness and generosity of spirit to all you come into contact with. It isn’t instinctual to be kind to strangers or people who scare you.

10. Be persistent even if a particular group does seem to be a dead end for you, try another:- 
If you are persistent, challenging the assumptions and feelings that tell you to give up and resign yourself to a life of loneliness, and showing up and being curiousand kind to others and more and more groups, the odds are in your favor.

More from Your Tango: Why You Should Never Stop Looking For Love

And once you have a friend or two, nourish those friendships with time and attention. Don’t be too cautious about whether you are giving more than you are getting at first. If you make more friends and some of them are takers, you can choose to spend more time with the friends who reward your friendship.

Tenni Ball Stretch help release Tension!

Tennis Ball Stretch!

Working hard for you every day, your feet are the foundation for good posture and keeping your entire body in balance. The foot is an extremely complex structure made up of 26 bones, 33 joints, 19 muscles and 107 ligaments.

Unfortunately, many people neglect their feet. As a result, your feet can become tight from walking, running, exercising and even playing golf. In addition to staying hydrated, one of the best things you can do to support the health of your feet and your body is give your footsies a regular rub down using a tennis ball. This will greatly help your posture, reduce tension, support relaxation, improve circulation, and can even help prevent injuries.

The best part is that a tennis ball is inexpensive, easy to find, convenient to carry walking 18 holes. It’s also a great way to start your morning, take a break between school and golf practice, or relax before bed.

and can help you release a lot of tension in minimal time. This stretching exercise feels especially good after standing for long periods of time or

How To Stretch Your Feet: Do Some “Sole Searching”

1:-Take off your shoes

2:-Stand on 1 foot and place the tennis ball under your other foot

3:-Slowly put your weight down on the ball and gently roll the ball front to back and side to side

4:-When you find a tender spot apply steady pressure for 30 seconds and breath

5:-Navigate your foot trying to search and destroy those nasty knots until the pain dissipates

6:-When ready, switch to the other foot and repeat

You can also use your tennis ball to explore your body for other tight and painful areas.

Try using it on your neck, chest, thighs, calves, or anywhere that tension builds up in your body. Best of all, throw your tennis ball into your backpack or golf bag and you’ll have your own masseuse on-the-go.

 You can also use a lacrosse ball or golf ball to do this, but those will be much more painful.

Anxiety Reduce Yoga Excercise!

Everyone suffers from mild anxiety from time to time, but chronic anxiety takes a tremendous toll on the body, draining energy resources and keeping the body in a constant state of stress. The effects of anxiety are magnified when the body is not exercised  tension in the muscles builds, breathing remains constricted most of the time, and the mind has no rest from the whirling thoughts and feelings that feed the anxiety.

Yoga helps you to access an inner strength that allows you to face the sometimes-overwhelming fears, frustrations, and challenges of everyday life. The American Yoga Association program to reduce stress in the body, breath, and mind does so by building coping skills with a small daily routine of exercise, breathing, and meditation. A few Yoga exercises practiced daily (especially if they are done just prior to meditation) help to regulate the breath and relax the body by gently releasing tension from the large muscle groups, flushing all parts of the body and brain with fresh blood, oxygen, and other nutrients, and increasing feelings of well-being. "Whole body" exercises such as the Sun Poses are particularly helpful because they encourage you to breathe deeply and rhythmically. Many exercises can be adapted so you can do them even in an office chair. Our Basic Yoga video provides a complete introduction to these exercises and contains a 30-minute exercise routine with breathing, relaxation and meditation.

The Complete Breath technique is a must for anyone who often feels "stressed out." Once learned, the Complete Breath can be used anywhere, anytime, to reduce the severity of a panic attack, to calm the mind, or to cope with a difficult situation. Learning to concentrate simply on the sound of the breath as you inhale and exhale evenly and smoothly will help you gently but effectively switch your attention from feelings of anxiety to feelings of relaxation.

Daily practice of complete relaxation and meditation is also essential - even a few minutes of meditation during your work day can make a difference. This daily training in focusing the mind on stillness will teach you how to consciously quiet your mind whenever you feel overwhelmed. Meditation puts you in touch with your inner resources; this means less dependence on medications, greater self-awareness, and a fuller, happier life.

Breathing Exercises to Relax Mind and body Soul!

 Overworked, underslept and feeling the pressure? There are plenty of ways to find calm, without investing in a four-hand spa massage. All you need is a pair of lungs, your breath and 10 minutes or less.  

Don’t wait until fight or flight kicks in before minding your breath. Controlled breathing not only keeps the mind and body functioning at their best, it can also lower blood pressure, promote feelings of calm and relaxation and help us de-stress.

While the effects of breathing techniques on anxiety haven’t yet been studied at length (at least not in a controlled clinical setting), many experts encourage using the breath as a means of increasing awareness, mindfulness or, for the yogis among us, finding that elusive state of Zen. To get to the bottom of the breath work, Greatist spoke to breathing expert Dr. Alison McConnell, yoga instructor Rebecca Pacheco and psychologist Dr. Ellen Langer. But follow closely: breathing easy isn’t quite as easy as it sounds.

From the confines of a bed, a desk or anyplace where negativity finds its way, consider these six breathing techniques to help keep calm and carry on.

1.Equal Breathing:-

How it’s done: Balance can do a body good, beginning with the breath. To start, inhale for a count of four, then exhale for a count of four — all through the nose, which adds a natural resistance to the breath. Got the basic pranayama down? More advanced yogis can aim for six to eight counts per breath with the same goal in mind: calm the nervous system, increase focus and reduce stress, Pacheco says.

When it works best: Anytime, anyplace — but this is one technique that’s especially effective before bed. “Similar tocounting sheep,” Pacheco says, “if you’re having trouble falling asleep, this breath can help take your mind off the racing thoughts, or whatever might be distracting you from sleep.”

Level of difficulty: Beginner

2. Abdominal Breathing Technique

How it’s done: With one hand on the chest and the other on the belly, take a deep breath in through the nose, ensuring the diaphragm (not the chest) inflates with enough air to create a stretch in the lungs. The goal: Six to 10 deep, slow breaths per minute for 10 minutes each day to experience immediate reductions to heart rate and blood pressure, McConnell says. Keep at it for six to eight weeks, and those benefits might stick around even longer.

When it works best: Before an exam, or any stressful event. But keep in mind, “Those who operate in a stressed state all the time might be a little shocked how hard it is to control the breath,” Pacheco says. To help train the breath, consider biofeedback tools such as McConnell’s Breathe Strong app, which can help users pace their breathing wherever they are.

Level of difficulty: Beginner

3.Alternate Nostril Breathing:-

How it’s done: A yogi’s best friend, this breath is said to bring calm and balance, and unite the right and left sides of the brain. Starting in a comfortable meditative pose, hold the right thumb over the right nostril and inhale deeply through the left nostril. At the peak of inhalation, close off the left nostril with the ring finger, then exhale through the right nostril. Continue the pattern, inhaling through the right nostril, closing it off with the right thumb and exhaling through the left nostril.

When it works best: Crunch time, or whenever it’s time to focus or energize. Just don’t try this one before bed: Nadi shodhana is said to “clear the channels” and make people feel more awake. “It’s almost like a cup of coffee,” Pacheco says.

Level of difficulty: Intermediate

4.Skull Shining Breath:-

How it’s done: Ready to brighten up your day from the inside out? This one begins with a long, slow inhale, followed by a quick, powerful exhale generated from the lower belly. Once comfortable with the contraction, up the pace to one inhale-exhale (all through the nose) every one to two seconds, for a total of 10 breaths.

When it works best: When it’s time to wake up, warm up or start looking on the brighter side of things. “It’s pretty abdominal-intensive,” Pacheco says, “but it will warm up the body, shake off stale energy and wake up the brain.” If alternate nostril breathing is like coffee, consider this a shot of espresso, she says.

Level of difficulty: Advanced

5. Progressive Relaxation

How it’s done: To nix tension from head to toe, close the eyes and focus on tensing and relaxingeach muscle group for two to three seconds each. Start with the feet and toes, then move up to the knees, thighs, rear, chest, arms, hands, neck, jaw and eyes — all while maintaining deep, slow breaths. Having trouble staying on track? Anxiety and panic specialist Dr. Patricia Farrell suggests we breathe in through the nose, hold for a count of five while themuscles tense, then breathe out through the mouth on release.

When it works best: At home, at a desk or even on the road. One word of caution: Dizziness is never the goal. If holding the breath ever feels uncomfortable, tone it down to just a few seconds at most.

Level of difficulty: Beginner

6. Guided Visualization:-

How it’s done: Head straight for that “happy place,” no questions asked. With a coach, therapist or helpful recording as your guide, breathe deeply while focusing on pleasant, positive images to replace any negative thoughts. Psychologist Dr. Ellen Langer explains that while it’s just one means of achieving mindfulness, “Guidedvisualization helps puts you in the place you want to be, rather than letting your mind go to the internal dialogue that is stressful.”

Reduce Anxiety and Manage Stress!

Everyone suffers from mild anxiety from time to time, but chronic anxiety takes a tremendous toll on the body, draining energy resources and keeping the body in a constant state of stress. The effects of anxiety are magnified when the body is not exercised: tension in the muscles builds, breathing remains constricted most of the time, and the mind has no rest from the whirling thoughts and feelings that feed the anxiety.

Yoga helps you to access an inner strength that allows you to face the sometimes-overwhelming fears, frustrations, and challenges of everyday life.
A few Yoga exercises practiced daily (especially if they are done just prior to meditation) help to regulate the breath and relax the body by gently releasing tension from the large muscle groups, flushing all parts of the body and brain with fresh blood, oxygen, and other nutrients, and increasing feelings of well-being. "Whole body" exercises such as the Sun Poses are particularly helpful because they encourage you to breathe deeply and rhythmically.

The Complete Breath technique is a must for anyone who often feels "stressed out." Once learned, the Complete Breath can be used anywhere, anytime, to reduce the severity of a panic attack, to calm the mind, or to cope with a difficult situation. Learning to concentrate simply on the sound of the breath as you inhale and exhale evenly and smoothly will help you gently but effectively switch your attention from feelings of anxiety to feelings of relaxation.

Daily practice of complete relaxation and meditation is also essential - even a few minutes of meditation during your work day can make a difference. This daily training in focusing the mind on stillness will teach you how to consciously quiet your mind whenever you feel overwhelmed. Meditation puts you in touch with your inner resources; this means less dependence on medications, greaterself-awareness, and a fuller, happier life.

For Keeping Peace in an Out of Control World!

In an age of endless technology and societal demands, I am acutely aware of the ever constant pressures of living in an out of control world. What used to come naturally to me now requires a conscious effort to remain peaceful and calm.

Here are ten tips that you can practice in order to maintain your sense of serenity in a chaotic environment:

1:-Remain emotionally detached from the drama and chaos. Someone coined the phrase, "You don't have to attend every argument you're invited to." This holds true for drama as well. Make a commitment to never initiate or engage in it.

2:-Remove yourself from the discord whenever possible. You have free will and Divine rights. If something is not benefiting you, you have every right to walk away from it.

3:-Put everything into perspective. Some humans have a sad habit of making a mountain out of a molehill. Is this situation really so serious that drama is a natural component? A life-threatening injury or natural disaster perhaps; everything else not so much.

4:-Set boundaries and limits with drama queens. You are not required to be subjected to the havoc they generate.

5:- Practicemindfulness - live in and enjoy the moment. Let go of the past - it's yesterday's news; do not worry about the future - it never arrives. Remain focused on where you are now and what you are thinking, feeling, and doing. Concern yourself only with the now.

6:-Let go of whatever you cannot control. If it is not within you have no power over it. "Let go and let God" is a wonderfully calming mantra to behold

7:-Think before responding. Not every situation requires a response. But if in fact you choose to reply give careful consideration to your choice of words and actions making sure they are calming responses rather than inflammatory.

8:-Have faith and trust in Godremembering that all is as it is meant to be. Many stressful experiences have a higher purpose. Know that your Heavenly Father will be the Light in your darkness, He will calm the internal storm, and make right everything in your life - in His time, not necessarily ours.

9:- It is not the experience that we need to concern ourselves with but rather what it is here to teach us and how we are meant to use it for our own good and the good of humanity. We often put too much emphasis on the event rather than on Divine Purpose.

10:-Commit to peace. Make it your way of life. Never allow anyone to distract you or interfere with your right to live in Divine harmony with the world.

Everything is subjective. I can choose to involve myself in the chaos of the world and allow myself to become infected by all of the drama. Or I can accept my Divine birthright and live harmoniously even in an out of control world. For me, nothing matters more than peace.

Emotion Affect Your Health!

Mind/Body Connection: How Your Emotions Affect Your Health

What is good emotional health?

People who have good emotional health are aware of their thoughts, feelings and behaviors. They have learned healthy ways to cope with the stress and problems that are a normal part of life. They feel good about themselves and have healthy relationships.

However, many things that happen in your life can disrupt your emotional health and lead to strong feelings of sadness, stress or anxiety. These things include:

1:-Being laid off from your job

2:-Having a child leave or return home

3:-Dealing with the death of a loved one

4:-Getting divorced or married

5:-Suffering an illness or an injury

6:-Getting a job promotion

7:-Experiencing money problems

8:-Moving to a new home

9:-Having a baby

“Good” changes can be just as stressful as “bad” changes.

How can my emotions affect my health?

Your body responds to the way you think, feel and act. This is often called the “mind/body connection.” When you are stressed, anxious or upset, your body tries to tell you that something isn’t right. For example, high blood pressure or a stomach ulcer might develop after a particularly stressful event, such as the death of a loved one. The following can be physical signs that your emotional health is out of balance:

1:-Back pain

2:-Change in appetite

3:-Chest pain

4:-Constipation or diarrhea

5:-Dry mouth

6:-Extreme tiredness

7:-General aches and pains

8:-Headaches

9:-High blood pressure

10:-Insomnia (trouble sleeping)

11:-Lightheadedness

12:-Palpitations (the feeling that your heart is racing)

13:-Sexual problems

14:-Shortness of breath

15:-Stiff neck

16:-Sweating

17:-Upset stomach

18:-Weight gain or loss

Pooremotional health can weaken your body's immune system, making you more likely to get colds and other infections during emotionally difficult times. Also, when you are feeling stressed, anxious or upset, you may not take care of your health as well as you should. You may not feel like exercising, eating nutritious foods or taking medicine that your doctor prescribes. Abuse of alcohol, tobacco or other drugs may also be a sign of poor emotional health.

Why does my doctor need to know about my emotions?

You may not be used to talking to your doctor about your feelings or problems in your personal life. But remember, he or she can’t always tell that you’re feeling stressed, anxious or upset just by looking at you. It’s important to be honest with your doctor if you are having these feelings.

First, he or she will need to make sure that other health problems aren’t causing your physical symptoms. If your symptoms aren’t caused by other health problems, you and your doctor can address the emotional causes of your symptoms. Your doctor may suggest ways to treat your physical symptoms while you work together to improve your emotional health.

If your negative feelings don’t go away and are so strong that they keep you from enjoying life, it’s especially important for you to talk to your doctor. You may have what doctors call “major depression.” Depression is a medical illness that can be treated with individualized counseling,

medicine or with both.

How can I improve my emotional health?

First, try to recognize your emotions and understand why you are having them. Sorting out the causes of sadness, stress and anxiety in your life can help you manage your emotional health. The following are some other helpful tips.

Express your feelings in appropriate ways. If feelings of stress, sadness or anxiety are causing physical problems, keeping these feelings inside can make you feel worse. It’s OK to let your loved ones know when something is bothering you. However, keep in mind that your family and friends may not be able to help you deal with your feelings appropriately. At these times, ask someone outside the situation--such as your family doctor, a counselor or a religious advisor--for advice and support to help you improve your emotional health.

Live a balanced life. Try not to obsess about the problems at work, school or home that lead to negative feelings. This doesn’t mean you have to pretend to be happy when you feel stressed, anxious or upset. It’s important to deal with these negative feelings, but try to focus on the positive things in your life too. You may want to use a journal to keep track of things that make you feel happy or peaceful. Some research has shown that having a positive outlook can improve your quality of life and give your health a boost. You may also need to find ways to let go of some things in your life that make you feel stressed and overwhelmed. Make time for things you enjoy.

Develop resilience. People with resilience are able to cope with stress in a healthy way. Resilience can be learned and strengthened with different strategies. These include having social support, keeping a positive view of yourself, accepting change and keeping things in perspective.

Calm your mind and body. Relaxation methods, such as meditation, are useful ways to bring your emotions into balance. Meditation is a form of guided thought. It can take many forms. For example, you may do it by exercising, stretching or breathing deeply. Ask your family doctor for advice about relaxation methods.

Take care of yourself. To have good emotional health, it’s important to take care of your body by having a regular routine for eating healthy meals, getting enough sleep and exercising to relieve pent-up tension. Avoid overeating and don’t abuse drugs or alcohol. Using drugs or alcohol just causes other problems, such as family and health problems.

Develop Your Spiritual Life!

Healers believe that everyone has a healing mechanism that flows as an energy force around the body, mind and spirit to keep them in perfect order. Unfortunately, stress, an inadequate diet, a negative attitude and other adverse factors can block our healing mechanism so that it cannot function correctly and we get ill. Spiritual healing provides the energy needed to crank our own healing mechanism back into action. When a healer lays his hand on you, he acts as a conductor or channel for the healing energy which he believes has the "intelligence" to go where it is needed.

Healers say that all of us have the power to heal, if we choose to develop it. However, some do seem to have a healing gift.

Healing does not always work at a physical level; the illness may remain but the ability to cope with it improves. Sometimes it does not work at all. This may be because the sick person "blocks" the healing forces - some people subconsciously prefer to be ill. It may also be because we "need" to remain ill.

Healing is not just about living well, but also dying well. People healed when they are dying may die more peacefully.

Typically, to begin the treatment the healer will attune with the healing energy. Then he may scan your body, with his hands hovering just above you. This scanning is to take a reading of your body's energy levels and to locate areas of low or blocked energy where healing is needed. How long the healer spends on each area is determined by your body's needs. Generally, the session lasts about an hour. All healers work in this way, but some employ additional healing tools such as visualization, past lives therapy, aura healing or they may concentrate on using the "chakras" the seven main energy centers of the body.

During the treatment you may feel heat coming from the healer's hands, although some people feel a draught, a tingling sensation, pins and needles, or a feeling of fight-headedness. Afterwards, most people say they feel relaxed and peaceful, although you might feel thirsty or sleepy. Leave a few days or a week between sessions to give the healing time to word.

Spiritual healing can help with any problem, mental, physical or emotional. Healers are especially effective for musculo-skeletal problems. such as frozen shoulders, stiff necks and bad knees.

What can you Do to Develop Your Spiritual Life:- 
You can deepen your commitment to spirituality through any of the following means:

1:-Regular participation in church or your preferred spiritually based organization.

2:-Regular reading of inspirational literature of your preference. It's good to do this at least once per day, either upon awakening, during your lunch break, or before retiring.

3:-Regular practice of meditation.

4:-Regular practice of prayer or spiritual affirmations.

5:-Get help from others (Healing practitioners, intercessory prayer, etc.)

6:-Join a prayer group or get involved in a 12-step program that is relevant to your needs. (The 12-step programs offer many people a well-conceived and effective approach for healing addictions. Although they began with Alcoholics Anonymous 50 years ago, they now include a wide range of programs such as Emotions Anonymous, Co-Dependents Anonymous, and so on. Consult your local chapter of the National Council on Alcoholism for a list of 12-step groups in your area.)

Specific Benefits of  Developing Your Spirituality:- 

‘The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook,’ has described a number of benefits to spirituality as it applies to healing emotional problems.List a number of benefits that are gained through

 spirituality. These are:

1:-Security and Safety:-

Through developing a connection with God, you gain security through the conviction that you are not all alone in the universe, even at those times when you feel temporarily separated from other people. You feel increasingly safe as you come to believe that there is a source you can always turn to in times of difficulty. As the twenty third psalm says, "God is my shepherd," he will take care of me and won’t let me get into trouble if I trust him. There is much security to be gained through the understanding that there is no problem or difficulty that cannot be resolved through the help of God.

2:-Peace of Mind:-

Peace of mind is the result of feeling a deep, abiding sense of security and safety. The more reliance and trust you develop in God, the easier it becomes to deal without fear or worry with the inevitable challenges life brings. It is not that you give up your self or your will to such a power; rather you simply learn that you can "let go" and turn to God when you feel stuck with a problem in living and don't know how to proceed. Learning how to let go when solutions to problems aren't immediately apparent can go a long way toward reducing worry and anxiety in your life. Peace of mind is what develops in the absence of such anxiety.

3:-Self Confidence:-

As you develop a relationship with God, you come to realize that he has created you and hence he has found something good in you. You are part of the universe. You're good, lovable, and worthy of respect just by virtue of the fact that you're God’s creation. This realization can improve the way you look at yourself and will help you to improve your ego and what you think of yourself. You are still inherently good and worthwhile. Your own judgments of yourself, however negative, do not ultimately count if you are a creation of the universe as much as everything else. As one person put it: "God doesn't make junk."

4:-The Capacity to Give and Receive Unconditional Love:- 

The most fundamental characteristic of God is that it offers you an experience of unconditional love. This is a kind of love which differs from romantic love or even ordinary friendship. It entails an absolute caring for the welfare of another without any preconditions. That is, no matter how another person appears or acts, you have compassion and care for them without judgment. As you develop a deeper connection with God, you come to experience greater degrees of unconditional love in your life. You feel your heart opening more easily to people and their concerns. You feel freer of judgment toward them or of making comparisons among them. Unconditional love shows up both in your increased capacity to give love to others and to experience more of it coming into your life. You begin to experience less fear and more joy in your life and help to inspire others to experience their own capacity for unconditional love. This kind of love also manifests itself through the experience of having everything you need in your life to get on with what you want to do. 

Guidance:-

Developing a relationship with God will provide you with guidance for making decisions and solving problems. God has a universal wisdom that goes beyond what you can accomplish through your own intellect. In traditional religions this has been referred to as the "divine intelligence."

Follow these guidelines for an effective relationship with God:

1:-Be quiet, patient, and open before God

2:-Be confident that he will communicate his wishes and help you execute them.

3:-Do not tempt God or make terms with Him. Gandhi said, "Not until we have reduced ourselves to nothingness, can we conquer the evil in us. God demands nothing less than complete self-surrender as the price for the only real freedom that is worth having. And when a man thus loses himself, he immediately finds himself in the service of all that lives. It becomes his delight and his recreation."

4:-Be willing to accept what God provides. He knows best. "Thy will, not mine, be done." Have full trust in the wisdom of God.

5:-Ask for God’s help. Do not instruct him on what to do.

6:-Let God speak to you through his Word. Read spiritual and religious books such as the Bible andlearn about the rules of victorious living.

These are some of the characteristics that define a close relationship with God. All of them can significantly contribute to your personal healing process. The extent and sincerity of your commitment will determine the degree of personal healing you experience.